Dear Mandy, Lots of work ahead, I'm afraid. I read your lengthy letter and saw how chaotic things can get for you. I saw so many things that I thought you could work on. About him leaving, here is that article. What to do when he or she leaves. My website was never really designed for others to read. It is really my notes to me about what I have learned about relationships. On the front page is a Search box. You might want to use that. The article I am sending you, has reference to two other articles. You might want to read those. The most important article for me is all about "Why relationships and what's going on.". It is called the Map of Relationships. Read, or listen to, it and then pose your questions again. At least that is my suggestion. Warmly, Al