Hi Friend, Welcome to any ideas I have that may be of assistance. Here are a few more. Seems that the vast majority of people who come to my website are currently clingers. They share in that they are in more or less panic and some partner is pulling away. And so you are, I believe, in good company. Another thought is that no one is a Clinger or an Avoider. These are postures we tend to adopt when we are either under-whelmed or over-whelmed by input or connection with others. Everyone who is in the dating scene seems to be in a clinger mode, and over time half of them will switch to avoider if their dating goes on very long. You also noted, about the world of avoiders, that your partner may be overwhelmed by your actions or those of others (work). Good noticing. The goal for you is to become the most underwhelming influence in his life, so that he runs from work to you. You might look at my paper on What to do when he/she leaves for more ideas. I think it is a matter of keeping your partner by a) not "needing" them but b) by enjoying them. Avoiders are really nice people except when they are overwhelmed. Just as we clingy people are nice when we don't get panicky and chase people. Good luck. Al